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Weird headlines brighten week

Weird headlines brighten week


By Mike Wilcox


It’s been a long week. My dog is sick, thus I’ve had very little sleep. My vehicle needs repairs thus I’ve had to set aside money I don’t have. And all my annual bills, including property tax, are due this week. That’s more money I have to pull from somewhere.

So I’ve decided to put on my smiley face, get out of the doldrums and jump on the Internet to find the weird and unusual. I always manage a smile or two when I read headlines like these from true stories:

  • Woman pleads guilty to causing death by sitting on boyfriend
  • Lonely Chinese man buys puppy only to find out later it is a rat
  • Alleged sexual abuse of guinea pig in parking lot under investigation, deputies say
  • American Airlines passenger left in wheelchair overnight in airport after flight is cancelled
  • Man says he killed girlfriend but will surrender after he smokes crack, South Carolina cops say
  • Florida Atlantic University students threaten to kill professor after he schedules 7 a.m. exam, police say
  • Toothbrush holder in bathroom turns out to be a jar dating back to 1900 BC
  • “Crazy Rich Asians” flops at Chinese box office
  • Lawsuit over sound of cowbells divides small German town
  • Realistic Christmas decorations fool passerby who tries to save fake dummy hanging from roof
  • Football players suspended from team for running naked with Oreos wedged in buttocks
  • Grandmother mistaken for man ends up in male jail cell
  • Texas man drives away from car crash with other man on his hood
  • Payless opens fake luxury store, sells customers $20 shoes for $600 as experiment
  • Pastor takes church service to new heights by preaching on zip line
  • Oakland University to fight shooters with hockey pucks
  • Young Scots say not drinking alcohol holds back their careers
  • Man crushed to death by forklift driven by pet dog
  • German teen loses license after 45 minutes
  • Massachusetts mayor first in line as recreational marijuana sales begin
  • Russian cops put out fire with snowballs
  • Woman, 73, worried about meth she is smoking asks doctor to test it
  • Italian town catches 58,000 speeding cars in two weeks
  • Texas students will soon learn slavery played major role in Civil War
  • Man’s runny nose turns out to be leaking brain fluid

As I reported at the top, these headlines are not fake news. Our world can be crazy at times.

After looking through these headlines, my week got better. No matter how bad we think we have it, lots of others have it worse. Just remember that.